time to move on

So, here I am. Back at square one.

I write this here because then I know that no one will actually see it. Sort of a chance for me to vent without having it affect any one else.

I am so unhappy with who I have become and the life that I have that it seems that starting over is the only option. I need to wipe the slate and create a new picture.

I cant seem to stop hurting people with the words that come out of my mouth and the things that I do.

I simply want the "American Dream" and that seems to be something that I will never achieve. I just want a husband, family, home, decent money, and a roof over my head. I dont think that is too much to ask.

Instead... I have a crappy job, debt, I can barely hang on to my friends, cant hang on to a relationship.

I think that I am too independent but maybe it is that I give too much slack. I tell people how I feel and they take that for granted and throw it back in my face.

I dont understand why this has to be so hard. I try to be a good person and it just fails. Every time.